A Gentleman or Lady's Pocket Guide to Birthday Etiquette

Chapter Four

When greeting an acquaintance
on his or her birthday, you have
one of three options:

1.
A handshake is always acceptable, and
should, in fact, be encouraged. A kiss, Parisian
style, of course, one for each cheek (please see

Figures A and B), should only be attempted
under ideal circumstances. An awkward
reach, or misguided ‘landing’ will only result

in embarrassment for each party. Assess
each situation on an individual basis and
proceed accordingly.

2.
A gentleman or lady of charm will always carry
copies of Jim Carroll’s birthday poem, or Frank
O’Hara’s odes to Rachmaninoff, for such occasions. A lady

or gentleman is always prepared. Of course, one of
the many difficulties with acquaintanceship is that one
may lose track of who has received a poem

in the past. Maintaining a chart and reviewing it
on a semi-regular basis should solve the problem (please
see Figure C).

3.
One must always be conscious of the fluid nature
of such relationships. Be aware! Be especially
observant of those acquaintances soon to be

friends. (The category of friends soon to be something
more will be dealt with in a later chapter.) This may be

the moment! A gentleman or lady knows, this may
be a moment, the moment, sometimes referred to as a bend
in the road (please see Figure D), when that which once was

is no more.

Saturday 11 March 2006

Do you know anything
about shape shifters?     or shape
shifting (an action item)     not a
chameleon (as they try to hide)     more
aKin to a goldfish     changing with its
environment     (when do they become koi?)

when did we become     (something else?)
(I've lost count     criss-crossing
storylines)     lost among the lines of kindred
paths     and characters.

Prayers to the B.V.M.

I want : smooth skin and soft curves. I want : someone
to sit in the car while I double park. I want : to travel

by train in a private compartment with windows that open
from the top and when we pull the pane down he says, I can
smell the buds on the trees, as we rush past. I want : a

mustachioed man to tickle behind my ear. I want : a brass band
for those occasions when nothing else will do. I want : was a band

in the late 80s that I never saw but hope that lead singer Brian
Hiltz is doing well. I want : seems so selfish but if I can’t ask you
than who? Assuming you can keep a secret, of course. I want : to ride

on the handlebars. I want : to be mistaken for someone glamorous,
or mysterious, captivating or maybe just someone with good bangs.

I want : someone who will kiss me in alley ways, who will kiss me
in all ways. I want : this too. I want : a second chance.

morning observation #58

This is not           how
I remember you.